After years being in to health and fitness, I have tried tons of trying different diets. I read as much as I can, and study the pros and cons. Trying these usually got me to my fitness goals, because of my extreme dedication to seeing things through.
Though looking back, I realize one thing. It isn't that much fun to be dieting. You never get to go out to eat, drink wine with your besties, or take a break from prepping meals everyday. Now, things are different for me. I still eat clean, but I like to "live and little". I don't stress about food nearly as much as I used to, and I Eat According To My Goals.
Your goals may be much different than mine, which means you may need to eat different than I do. If your goal is to lose 20 lbs you better start being strict. If your goal is to gain muscle, you should start consuming more calories and programming a strength training regimen.
Don't be so hard on yourself, be real with yourself. What do you want? How are you going to get there? 